So there was a slight misunderstanding with our provider and now our internet connection has been disconnected indefinitely. Well, for the next five days. It’s been five hours and I’m already starting to feel withdrawals. In truth, I was actually feeling them after five fucking minutes. It’s weird, isn’t it, that when have internet access we’re really quite blasé about it. But the second it disconnects we repeatedly tap the refresh button in desperate hope it comes back on because in that moment we realise that almost nothing can be done without it. Thus, dysfunction and perpetual boredom ensues.
But, to make the best of a bad situation I pulled myself together and searched for other ways I could fill in my time until decent TV started playing. I,
• cleaned the house
• took my brother for a driving lesson
• baked a cake
• ate majority of the mix
And now I find myself here. At the beach, writing?
Although I don’t particularly enjoy the coast (more of inland girl) the beach has long been a place of refuge for me. Any time I feel like something has been troubling me for too long I come to the beach to clear my head and get some perspective. Ya know, lost in awe at mesmerising spectacle of the sun setting into the horizon, its golden hue of daylight left behind turning into lingering shades of smudged blue and purple hinting at the forthcoming darkness of night, all of my troubles suddenly seem so fucking insignificant. To me, looking out into the horizon evokes the same feeling of boundless infinity and freedom as looking up into the sky on a still, starry night. And when I look into infinity, everything starts to make sense.
That is, when I am hit with the vastness of the universe and the ultimate, greater scheme of things, I am reminded that there must be more than this. ‘This’ being an insignificant existence in an even more insignificant town. And there is more. More places to see, more experiences to be had, more memories to be made, more people to fall in love with and more friends to make, more inspiration, more fun and more opportunities. More of a life. More purpose.
To me, life isn’t to be lived working around limitations. It is meant to be lived making the most of the infinite possibilities, the infinite opportunities, and our infinite potential.
(Talking on the topic of infinity, a Buzz Lightyear reference is inevitable, isn’t it?)